Saturday, August 22, 2009

Different flavours of farts

1) Ketchup and mustard: the best smelling fart, it reminds me of camping
2) Pizza and Wings: sometimes we get lucky and our movements smell like this
3) Pure Shit: feels comfortable, like home
4) Cotten Candy: just kidding, its impossible
5) Straight vodka: when really drunk and shit through the eye of a needle.

Listen, this is just my opinion

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Hockey Funs-Debbie at it again

No one can stick handle like Debbie. Prove it. This one day he told everybody to shut their traps and to watch and learn. Debbie picked up the puck and said "Who needs this?" and threw it into the stands. Debbie wanted to impress everyone by stick handling a basketball. But no one was watching Debbie show off...they were all looking over the boards. Debbie had thrown the puck clean through the teams trainer's face. Literally players were puking on the ice and crying. Coach Mahoney began choking on the Half Moon he was eating. What happened next will continue to haunt the dreams of Diblits at night....to be continued

Monday, August 17, 2009

Debbie Dibbs- Horseback riding...for the first time

Fire burned everything...no one was alive, only pools of blood remained.

2 Minutes earlier: Debbie decided to try riding a horse. He didn't even pay or get lessons, he ran straight for Horace, the blind horse. "Listen here you cock tease, my way or the.....ARRFH" Horace did not give a shit and he planted Debbie with a devastating round house. Debbie was incinerated instantly, all that remained was his shadow. But then he woke up, it was all a dream...or was it?

Friday, August 14, 2009

Rookie Camp-Debbie Diblits

Debbie arrived 3 hours late for his first practice. As the other guys were leaving the ice, Debbie stepped on the ice and said "Eat shit Mahoney", who is the coach. The biggest brawl known to mankind happened next. After an amazing beating at the hands of Mahoney, Debbie stumbled into the locker room. "Good game dudes" was all he said. From there it got ugly. Some a-hole jumped kicked Debbie in his face leaving his right ear paralyzed for life. Boys will be boys I guess. They all quickly made up and did a perfect rendition of the Thriller dance together. Holy ape fuck, Debbie is a wild guy. RIP Michael Jackson and eat shit Mahoney.